Smash and Slash Cherry Cordial Ice Cream - No Maker Needed

This is an adaptation of Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream (No Ice Cream Maker) (No Ice Cream Maker - Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream; thank you Luv4food). I was rather enthused with the design and decided to give it a whirl with some vanilla, cherries and chocolate bits. Preparation time can be longer if cherries are completely worked over by hand. Oh, and the "smash" refers to breaking down the chocolate into bits, and the "slash" refers to cutting up the cherries. I wanted to make it sound fun. =D

• Ready In: 6 hrs 30 mins
• Serves: 12
• Yields: 1/2 cup

Ingredients

• 2  cups cherries, dark and sweet
• 6  ounces  semisweet chocolate bars
• 2  cups  whipping cream
• 1⁄4 cup sugar
• 1 (14 ounce) can sweetened condensed milk
• 1 1⁄2 tablespoons water
• 2  teaspoons vanilla extract
• 2 -3  drops  red food coloring (optional)

Directions

1. Chill mixing bowls, mixer beaters, and all utensils you'll use in conjunction with the cream and milk.
2. Pit and chop up cherries in a contained environment, such as a large pot. Set aside, but save the remaining juice. Admire the blood-like spray of juice that inevitably got on you ;).
3. If you don't enjoy slashing up cherries, pitting them and chopping them in a blender or something is sufficient. Be sure to save the juice.
4. Put chocolate into a plastic bag and smash into small pieces with a mallet or the flat end of a tenderizer. Set aside.
5. Retrieve a (smaller) mixing bowl and whip the cream until very stiff, adding the sugar while whipping.
6. In the other (larger) mixing bowl, thoroughly mix the condensed milk, water, vanilla extract, cherry juice, and food coloring (optional).
7. Fold the whipped cream into the milk mixture. It can be rather chunky once it's all folded. Mmmm -- "chunky" ;).
8. Add the cherries and gently mix, but mix thoroughly.
9. Add the chocolate bits and gently, thoroughly mix.
10. Transfer the cream-milk-cherry-chocolate mixture into a 6-cup/1.5L freezer container. Please do not transfer from a large height. Or, y'know, try that. See how it goes for you ;D.
11. Freeze until semi-frozen, then stir.
12. Freeze for six hours total before eating =).