Do Americans Want Mayochup?

Heinz is letting the people decide.

By Hannah Petertil
April 12, 2018

Image: Heinz / Twitter

Ketchup, an American staple. Mayonnaise, a polarizing yet popular condiment. Joined together, they become MAYOCHUP, the condiment Americans have been missing. Just kidding, you could literally make this right now by mixing together ketchup and mayo in a bowl, but something about this beautiful packaging guarantees that the Heinz version is just going to taste better. We not only want this condiment to come to the USA, we NEED this condiment in our French fry-consumed lives, so here is how you can ensure Mayochup becomes a real, squeezable, drinkable (did I say that?) thing.  

All you have to do is vote on a Twitter poll posted by Heinz. Your options include ‘Pass the Heinz Mayochup’ or ‘Nah, I’ll make my own.’ In case you’re torn, I’m here to tell you, you must pick the first one. Because, at the time of writing this only 55% of voters want to see Mayochup come to the states while the obnoxious DIY contingent is holding strong at 45% — and I ask, who are these monsters?!

Here’s the deal: If you are a believer in the free market and endless rows of bottled condiments slowing taking over, first your fridge door and then your life, you need to shimmy on over to Twitter where Heinz is asking for 500,000 “yes” votes to make Mayochup the real deal.

According to my very back-of-the-envelope calculations, us pro-mayochup-ers need 234,646 more people to vote next in the next three days. So go vote here before April 15th. Save our condiment aisle from single-sauce obscurity. Bring Mayochup to the USA. Your fries, and mixing bowls, will thank you.

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About Hannah Petertil

A known candy hoarder and well-eaten traveler, Hannah gravitates toward grocery stores, where scoping out local favorites and ogling bulk bins could pass as her day job.