Guacamole from Heck

Perfected in 2009.

• Ready In: 20 mins
• Serves: 2

Ingredients

• 4  Hass avocadoes
• 1⁄2 lime, juice of
• 1⁄3 red onion, chopped
• 1  small tomatoes, diced
• 1  small  handful cilantro, no stems
• 1  teaspoon cumin
• 1 1⁄2 teaspoons berbere (Ethiopian red pepper)
•  generous  salt & freshly ground black pepper

• optional

• 1  habanero pepper, seeds removed

Directions

1. Select avocados that are slightly soft, with black rind, but not ones where the skin feels like it has separated from the flesh. Remove pit and rind, and stem-let at narrow end of rind, and add lime juice promptly. Mash until avocados are lumpy; do not blend. Mix in remaining ingredients coarsely. Serve with un- or lightly-salted white corn tortilla chips (e.g. Mission). Store with as little air as possible. Deposit rinds and other detritus in garden or compost pile.
2. Berbere is a spice mixture (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Berbere). LA denizens can find it in Little Ethiopia, just south of Fairfax & Olympic.
3. Hm. You've got 1/2 a lime left.
4. 2 oz Patron silver tequila.
5. 2 oz Grand Marnier.
6. Juice of 1 1/2 limes.
7. 1 egg white.
8. 2 generous handfuls ice.
9. 1 Tbsp finely grated lime rind.
10. Blend thoroughly. Serve in Ball jar. 2 servings. For rocks version, do not include egg white or lime rind; instead add a splash of water and distribute juiced lime rinds whole in glasses.